Tuesday, September 22, 2015

In Due Time: Review and Giveaway!



Jen Noonan is an infertility advocate and author of In Due Time, a memoir. She sent me an advance copy of her book in exchange for an honest review. I wasn't sure what to expect because I didn't know very much about Jen's story or what she had been through. But once I started reading it, I couldn't put it down!

In her book, Jen shares her journey though infertility and loss with vulnerability and honesty. She doesn't gloss over any of the hard parts or minimize the anxiety or pain that she experienced. And that's what makes this book so relatable. Whether you are newly diagnosed or an IVF vet, you will find more similarities to your own story than differences.

I think most of us start out believing that we will have the perfect family; we have everything all planned out. Jen felt confident that she would have a boy and girl, easily conceived. But then, life happens. And our plans and dreams are suddenly harder to obtain than we ever thought.

Jen describes the worry and anxiety she felt as she went month after month with BFNs. She started asking herself "what's wrong with me?" and "why is this taking so long?" I know we've all been there, and those obsessive thoughts can be so discouraging. I admire her willingness to try both Western and Eastern approaches to fertility and wellness, some of which seemed to really help her to feel calm and centered through some difficult times.

There were some chapters of Jen's book that I felt were reflections of my own story, especially when she experienced a miscarriage and the devastation and anger she felt afterwards. Or when she was so hopeful for her first IVF cycle and convinced herself that it would work. Finally, as she embarked on her 2nd FET, I empathized with her fear of a negative outcome and how she worked diligently to overcome that anxiety.

Sometimes life just doesn't work as planned. And when we convince ourselves that something will happen in a certain way, often times it doesn't. What I really loved about Jen's book is the lesson that we have to let go of expectations, and just be able to accept what is. There is so much that's out of our control, and we must allow ourselves to be vulnerable enough to accept any outcome.

I highly recommend this book to anyone in the infertility community, regardless of where you are on your journey. It's an informative, insightful, and inspiring read.

To learn more about Jen Noonan or to order a copy of her book, please visit www.induetimebook.com.

Now on to the raffle!
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Jen Noonan is a passionate primary and secondary infertility advocate who attempts to destigmatize the shame and guilt surrounding infertility and miscarriage. She is a freelance writer in the greater Metro Denver area. Born and raised in Chicago, she is an honorary Denver native, having called the Mile High city home for more than a decade. She lives with her husband, Patrick, their two sons, and a cat named Lois.

Jen is a Licensed Professional Counselor who holds a Master of Arts Degree in Counseling Psychology and Counseling Education from the University of Colorado Denver. She is an active member of the American Society for Reproductive Medicine. 

13 comments:

  1. That's a super tough question. It is not something I've gone through myself, and it would be hard to console someone going through it when I have healthy kids of my own. I would just do my best to remain positive and let them know I'm ALWAYS here to talk if they need it. I think one of the worst things people do when someone is struggling with infertility is make comments that they THINK are helping, but really make things worse. My good friend recently had a miscarriage, and was shocked at some of the things people would say to her trying to be nice but.... that actually hurt her far worse.

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  2. Thanks so much for the comment. I really appreciate what you say about letting others know you are there to talk. People are more receptive to that, or simply "I'm sorry for what you're going through." You are smack on when you talk about the comments others make. Thing is, I believe they don't do it intentionally. They're just "ignorant." This is one of the many reasons I wrote the book. I was able to weave into the narrative certain insensitive comments that were made to me, in the hopes of educating the public at large. Yes, miscarriage comments are really tough. You're already grieving your lost baby, and then the comments! But they just don't know what they're saying (IMO).

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  3. that's a hard one I never thought about it

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  4. I do work on a busy labor and delivery unit, so I see a lot of successful IVF pregnancies! I do have friends, however, that have been extremely unsuccessful in it and usually discuss the opportunity of meeting those in similar situations in order to give one another support. That seems to help them.

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    1. Meeting up with, and discussing my situation with others who could relate was one of the most helpful things I did during my journey. Thank you for encouraging others to do the same!!

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  5. We just finished our first IVF and I was convinced it had worked. It didn't. I'd love to read the book to find some inspiration of how to get through this journey. It can be quite lonely at times. Thank you for sharing this wonderful post.

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    1. So sorry to hear that Ann. I was so convinced our first frozen transfer would work. Everything looked perfect. We even had a genetically normal embryo. I was shocked afterwards to find out how often "normal" embryos result in negative betas and chemical pregnancies. Best wishes on your journey!

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  6. So often we plan our days and our lives, But then the unexpected happens to us. I had a wonderful family only to lose my husband at a very young age. My son was all I had left and I tried so hard to be strong around him, but behind him I was falling apart. My anxiety level just grew and grew so did my nervousness. Many times I was told to get over it and stop letting it pull me down. I use to say why don't people understand? They have no clue. I would love to read your story.

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    1. Debra, that is so true about planning our days and our lives. I'm sorry to hear about your husband. I can't imagine. When someone has not walked in your shoes, she/he can't possibly understand fully your experience. Hope you enjoy the book!

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  7. I would say to hang in there & to seek out information from others that have been in the same situation for advice.

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    1. Yes. As I mentioned above, being with others who "got it" helped immensely!

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