Happy Father's Day to a Someday Father

A Letter to My Husband on Father's Day

I'm writing you a letter on Father's Day because I think it's so important for you to be recognized. This journey is hard for you too, with the doctors appointments and all the "samples" you've had to provide. Its painful and challenging and awkward at times. It's more than you ever expected to go through to become a Dad. But even though you're not a father yet, you have the desire to become one. You have so much love in your heart, and I see it every time you play with our nieces and nephews. They all adore you and you are so good with them.

I think you'll be an amazing dad. Actually, it's something I think about a lot. You are patient, kind, loving, and funny. I imagine what it will be like when you hold our baby for the first time. I imagine you playing with him or her at home, making funny faces, and being goofy. I imagine you putting our baby to bed at night, rocking her to sleep, maybe reading a bedtime story. It breaks my heart wondering if any of those dreams will come true. Because it's the one thing I want more than anything in the world.

And I want this because of you. Because of the deep love I feel for you, as my husband and my best friend. I want to share this experience with you and no one else. I want our baby to be a reflection of the two of us, maybe with my brown hair and your blue eyes. Or maybe we'll have a little blonde girl like I've dreamed about. I imagine our baby to be imaginative and intelligent and kind. Or maybe creative and outgoing and confident. Maybe a mix of all that makes up the two of us.

It's this dream that keeps me going. You deserve to be a father; you'll be so good at it. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen, and I know you'll do the same. I'm so lucky to be married to someone who shares my dreams. I know you want this as badly as I do. And we WILL make it happen, whether it's through IVF or some other means. Someday we will take home OUR baby and start the next chapter in our lives as mother and father.

But until then, I will enjoy the time we have together as just the two of us (well, 3 if you count the dog). I love our little family and we both have so much more love to give. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us.

I love you.